February 25, 2009
By Larry Van Zandt
In case you have children; Sorry, but the interesting racing this Sunday was at another Phoenix track.
Hello again, gang.
Before I speak about this last Sunday’s ‘Auto Drooling 500’ Snoozefest, I first want to talk about this article...
Motorcycles for Children Pulled From Sale
I have been following this story for about a month now….and to be honest with you, it absolutely sickens me. This is nothing more than the Nanny State run amok, and the reasoning behind it defying all known logic. What idiot child is going to be chewing on engine cases or battery terminals? What are the dealers supposed to do about the $100,000,000 in inventory of children’s motorcycles and ATV’s that now has to be quarantined? Simply let them sit and collect dust in a warehouse? Most of these shops don’t have the room to be pulling stock back off of the floor, and due to these bikes being somewhat cheap, they sell a lot of these smaller bikes.
As noted in the article, the kids will simply go to larger bikes, or get a used one from someone off of Craigslist. However, since most of us have to go to the dealer for replacement parts (Motorcycles and ATV’s are not like cars, you have to go to the dealer more often for certain parts and pieces), those have been pulled off of the market, too? What are we supposed to do? Sit on Ebay and pray that replacement parts show up?
Even more priceless, is the fact that the safety commission simply does nothing but sit on their hands while dealers lose business. In an atmosphere where businesses everywhere are struggling (we see this in the NASCAR world, with sponsors abandoning the sport right and left), we’re now going to hamper businesses even further? You know, if one begins to take a hard look at the policies being enforced by the current administration, if one puts their foil hat on and looks with a bit of a paranoid eye, one might begin to think that it’s their intended purpose to ensure that as many businesses as possible simply fail.
Looking at this current children’s motorcycle/ATV crisis, one also begins to wonder if this particular assault on the motorcycle manufacturers isn’t merely the initial move to take all off-road cycles and ATV’s out of the hands of the populace, as part of a larger grand scheme to close all public lands to off-road vehicles. Yes, it’s a bit of a stretch trying to connect the two dots, but I’ve seen nothing from this current administration that shows that they are interested in exercising any legislative restraint. This lack of common sense also comes from the same administration that is about to spend three-hundred-billion on wiping out Global Warming (another scam), and vaporizing the coal industry in the process.
I hesitate to address anything political in here, but I know that a lot of you out there have children, and some of you probably ride off-road bikes and ATV’s. I know I’ve been riding for the last 31 years, and even though you end up dirty and nasty, it’s a heck of a release in so many ways. You don’t even have to be riding like a nut (as I do) to enjoy it, I will pack my ATV’s up, take a kid or two, and drive a few dozen miles to a riding spot, just to putt-putt around and enjoy the scenery. I could also do this on horseback, and ‘save the environment’, however, I think horses are majestic creatures (Oh, and they are also definitely stupid), and I’m not going to abuse one out on the trail, not when I can take an ATV out there and beat the crap out of it, and not worry about whether or not I’m abusing the horse. In addition to that, with an ATV, I’m not responsible for a living, breathing animal, so if I want to park the ATV in the garage for six months and forget it exists, Animal Control isn’t going to show up at my house and arrest me because my ATV fenders look too thin.
Oh well, that’s enough of my political rant for the day….
And now to last Sunday’s race.
I had a really difficult time watching the event at California Speedway. I mean, I was nodding off at points. What idiot decided it would be a great idea to keep this race in February, considering last year’s event also saw rain? If anything, the rain delays made a horribly boring race a little easier to watch, as it gave me an opportunity to have the kids shoot blow darts into my face just to wake me up, and I wouldn’t miss any of the race, screaming like a woman while pulling the darts out with pliers.
Does anyone from the NASCAR head office actually WATCH these races on TV? I don’t understand how they can’t see how boring and tedious some of these events have become…or are they too busy slapping each other on the back, celebrating yet another sponsor stolen from the teams?
Folks, I have to admit something; I actually spent quite a bit of time with my TV in ‘split-screen’ mode, and had NASCAR in the LITTLE WINDOW. What was on the larger screen?
The NHRA (National Hot Rod Association) drag racing event at Phoenix.
Yep, I was more interested in watching Drag Racing.
The only time I put NASCAR back into ‘big-screen’ mode was during pit stops (Greg Biffle’s last stop was heartbreaking, because I think he had the car to beat), and the last few laps after the final pit stop, where Matt Kenseth simply pulled away from Jeff Gordon, who vaporized his tires trying to catch up with Kenseth. THAT was good racing….well, at least up at the front, anyway. With Biffle breaking speed records in all 57 states (intentional), he was desperately trying to get back up to the front, but managed to pull out a 4th-place finish anyway….and I think he’s the one to watch at Las Vegas this next Sunday.
Other than the boring race, we already know just how bad the Fox Sports tenure is turning out. I’m now completely skipping the Pre-Race Saga, I mean the Pre-Race Show, as I’m growing weary of watching grown men grasp for straws for lack of anything interesting to talk about. I’m also growing weary of having to sit with my finger over the ‘last channel’ button on my TV remote, praying to God that Fox didn’t pick this particular week to begin airing X-rated commercial content.
A note to Fox: You people who do the ads for the show ‘24’; you did see the movie ‘Last Action Hero’, right? It’s perfectly okay if we don’t have 147 explosions, 239 car crashes, and 1,411 shots fired during every thirty-second ‘24’ commercial spot.
See you next week…
Larry of Green Gables
The thoughts and ideas expressed by this writer or any other writer on Insider Racing News, are not necessarily the views of the staff and/or management of IRN.
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